Mending Lives
by Lauren Wagner
Summary: Kurt's life gets shattered from one mission gone awry


Author's Note: If you go to Bamf Central, there's a link to Comics Continuum's preview of the next issue of UXM 445. I read it, and I regret it because... a plot bunny was lying in wait! Yes, right after I clicked on the last page, BAM! Plot bunnies on my face biting at me without mercy! I tried to hold them off, I swear I did but those bastards wouldn't get off! I tried and I tried, but they finally got to me!  
  
Damn plot bunnies... So this little thing is their entire fault! Evil little bunny things...  
  
Anyway, the idea that Kurt is upset that something went wrong is from the preview of 445... I don't want to give away too much really. But the premise that something goes wrong and Kurt is upset is Chris Claremont and Alan Davis' idea. The thing that ACTUALLY goes wrong for them is different from what goes wrong in this story.  
  
If you want to know what THEY have to upset Kurt with, look at the preview and then when it comes out Wednesday; buy it. But watch out for those damned plot bunnies when you look at the preview! They can be sneaky little bastards!  
  
Oh and one more thing, some of the dialogue between Kurt and the Reverend will be from issue 75 of Excalibur, when Kurt goes to make confession!  
  
And I used SheCat's argument about the Emma/Scott debate!  
  
On with the Plot Bunny induced story!  
  
It wasn't supposed to happen that way.  
  
Tilting his head back, Kurt let bitter tears fall as he stared up at the ceiling of the local chapel, the rosary in his hands twisting in his hands absently.  
  
He'd been in there for a good five hours now, having come after the incident had occurred. He had prayed fervently for the first three hours, trying to make sense out of the events that had transpired and yet, he still did not feel any better about what had happened out there with his team and the crisis they were trying to solve.  
  
"Kurt?" Looking to his left, Kurt saw Reverend Whedon looking at him with concern written all over his kindly old face. Sighing, he flopped his tail on the pew beside him, going back to staring at the ceiling. Reverend Whedon sat down beside him, letting silence hang in the air for a few minutes before he decided to break it and get to the heart of the situation.  
  
"Something is troubling you, Kurt." He said. "What's wrong?"  
  
"We had a mission today." Kurt said, his voice starting to crack. "I... A child is dead, Reverend Whedon. Dead because of what she was born as."  
  
"A mutant." Reverend Whedon said in a tone that was not quite a question. Kurt nodded, fresh tears burning his eyes and falling down the sides of his eyes. He kept his head tilted up, staring at the ceiling the entire time.  
  
"She was starting to grow a horn in the center of her brow like a Unicorn's." he said softly. "Her parents had driven her out of the house, and she was forced to steal for her meals...  
  
"These people, they had her surrounded and were pelting her with stones. They were shouting such hateful things, Reverend. This caused Mutants around the area to turn on them and attack, causing a mob scene of Human and Mutant hatred alike exploding into violence.  
  
"We came in just as the police's riot forces were running through the crowd and arresting people from both sides. We offered to help them, saying that we could deal with the Mutants, but they refused claiming that we would most likely just arrest the Humans and let the Mutants go. They held us off for so long..."  
  
Then he fell silent, his face becoming blank, despite the tears that continued to fall. Only his tail expressed his feelings, twisting and turning in agony.  
  
"What happened next, Kurt?" Reverend Whedon asked gently.  
  
"Someone drew a gun." Kurt whispered softly. "We heard a shot, and that's when everyone turned and ran for it. The child... She was dead when I got to her... The bullet had gone through her right eye and out the back of her head... There was so much blood...  
  
"The police blamed us for this, saying that we had distracted them from doing their duty... We were forced to run before they could clap us in irons and haul us away.  
  
"I've been here ever since, Reverend." He ended finally. Slowly, Kurt sat up, bowing his head and looking down at his rosary. It was made from red cherry wood beads with a silver cross on the end. Moira had given it to him when he was six, despite the fact that she didn't believe in it herself.  
  
"I'm so sorry, Kurt..." Reverend Whedon said softly, unable to think of what else to say.  
  
"I know, I... know. But why must we go through this Hell to get to Heaven? When will it end?" he asked, looking ahead at the giant Crucifix hanging over the altar. Reverend Whedon sighed softly, shaking his head a bit.  
  
"If you mean Man's fear of what's different, his hatred for what's hard to understand- - Soon, I pray. On that day, our faith promises there will be no more crying. No more hate. And no more fear. I'm afraid I have no immediate answers, my son. Until that day, we can only stay strong and not tire of doing good." He said finally. Slowly, Kurt narrowed his eyes, his hands becoming fists.  
  
"That's not good enough!" he hissed softly, surprising Reverend Whedon by standing up and turning on him with such rage in his eyes. "Why must we suffer now just God is too damn lazy to get off His fat ass and do something NOW about the evils going on in the world?"  
  
"Kurt..."  
  
"Why didn't He do something when Genosha and all sixteen million inhabitants were slaughtered? Why didn't He step in when this innocent child was slain! What about 9/11? He's had plenty of chances to do something about these evils, and yet He sits back and watches from a distance like that horrible Beth Midler song!" Kurt shouted, his voice echoing all around.  
  
"Kurt, you must calm yourself and understand..." Reverend Whedon tried. With a snort, Kurt walked past him and stalked up the aisle to the front doors that led outside.  
  
"I'm through with this, Reverend!" he said, turning back to him. "I'm through with fighting for this bastards who don't try to change, I'm through with seeing people suffer, and I'm through with this if He doesn't even do anything when people are slaughtered in HIS OWN DAMN HOUSE!" He screamed, remembering Father Whitley and the Church of Humanity.  
  
Looking at the rosary in his hand, Kurt narrowed his eyes, clenching them in a tight fist before he turned and hurled them to the ground, slamming the doors behind him as he left.  
  
Reverend Whedon watched him leave helplessly, shaking his head sadly. Walking up, he saw that the old rosary had shattered from the force at which Kurt had thrown them. Bending down, he carefully picked up the pieces and went into his office to give the mansion a call.  
  
Logan was on the phone with the Reverend when Kurt walked by, a look of determination on his face.  
  
"Kurt, we need to talk." He said, hanging up the phone. Kurt ignored him, brushing past Scott harshly as he climbed up the stairs to his room.  
  
"What's wrong with Kurt?" Scott asked, cocking an eyebrow. Logan shook his head a bit.  
  
"That was the Reverend on the phone before." He said. "He says that Kurt's really upset over the girl that was killed at that riot this morning."  
  
"Oh dear." Scott sighed softly, placing his hands on his hips. "I wish the professor still lived here. He could always talk to Kurt when he didn't want to talk to any of us about his problems." Logan nodded sadly.  
  
"I can't argue with you there, One-Eye." He said. "Sometimes I wonder if Chuck did the right thing by leaving the mansion."  
  
When Kurt came back down, he had a large bag slung over his one shoulder and his three uniforms in his other hand. He had his old one from when he first joined the X-men, the leather one they had taken to wearing for a while, and the new spandex ones they had started to wear.  
  
Without a word, he threw them in Scott's lap.  
  
"Kurt, what is this?" Scott asked, standing up and looking at the uniforms in confusion.  
  
"My resignation papers." Kurt said blankly, heading for the front door.  
  
"You're leaving? But..."  
  
"Oh let the little half-demon go." Emma said silkily, her hand taking Scott's hands firmly. "We can do just as well without him." Kurt ignored the stab, continuing on his way in silence.  
  
"He's not half-demon." Scott said angrily. "His father's a Mutant like his mother." Emma shrugged, putting on his ultimate slutty best for Scott.  
  
"I forget that sometimes." She said. "But whatever he is, we don't need him. We have so many others that can help..." She used her powers to tilt Scott in her favor, and he soon was sitting back on the couch with her, accepting the fact that they didn't really need Kurt after all.  
  
She could twist Scott to her way, but she couldn't twist Logan to her way.  
  
Narrowing his eyes, Logan ran after Kurt and caught him by the elbow, just as he was getting ready to get into one of the cars.  
  
"Let go of me." Kurt said without looking at him. "I'm through with protecting a bunch of savages!"  
  
"I think there's some kind of role reversal going on here, Elf." Logan said. "I'm usually the one trying to leave and you're the one who gets me to stay instead."  
  
"My mistake." Kurt said. "Are you going to let me go or do I have to teleport away from you?"  
  
"You can try." Logan said. "But I'll hunt you down if I have to. Why don't you stay and talk about this?" Kurt shook his head.  
  
"There's nothing to talk about." He said. "I'm leaving and that's final." With that, he teleported into the car and slammed on the gas, charging through the gates before Logan could do anything to stop him.  
  
Sighing, Logan placed his hands on his hips, shaking his head a bit. He had to do something to try and change Kurt's mind.  
  
He had to try, but what could he do?  
  
Three Months Later  
  
Nothing had changed; Kurt hadn't expected it to either. He lived in an apartment, taking care of himself as far as he was concerned. He had given up on prayer; prayer was for the foolish who honestly believed that God cared what they asked for.  
  
Kurt received letters and phone messages from his worried friends and former students from the mansion, but he ignored them, deleting the messages and burning the letters without opening them.  
  
So many years of his life... wasted in protecting those who would never appreciate or care about his and the other's sacrifices.  
  
He was thinking about this when he heard someone knocking on his door. When he opened it, he tried to slam it shut again, but Logan stopped it with one strong hand and entered the room easily.  
  
"You're not getting rid of me that easily." He said.  
  
"What do you want?" Kurt snapped, crossing his arms over his chest.  
  
"I want you to come back to the school with me."  
  
"Never."  
  
"Kurt..."  
  
"No."  
  
"Listen..."  
  
"Get out before I teleport your head from your shoulders." Logan snorted softly, shaking his head.  
  
"You wouldn't do that to me, Kurt." He said simply. "You wouldn't hurt a flea if it was sucking your blood right from your tail!"  
  
"Times change."  
  
"Tell me about it." Logan sighed softly. Shaking his head, he shrugged a bit. "I can see that you're not going back are you?"  
  
"You see right." Kurt said. "Can you see that I want you out of here too?" he asked, raising his eyebrows slightly.  
  
"Yeah, I do." Logan snorted softly. Kurt turned around swiftly, his tail swishing in agitation.  
  
"Then get out." He said. He heard Logan put something down on his table, and then he left his apartment. Turning around, Kurt's hard eyes softened faintly.  
  
His broken rosary lay on the table, looking forlorn and so very old and neglected.  
  
He remembered the day that he got it, and he remembered how happy he was too. Slowly, he walked up and sat at the table, turning the broken beads in his fingers slowly.  
  
In a way, the rosary represented his life now; shattered and cracked, unable to be fixed.  
  
Or was it?  
  
Slowly, Kurt slid a bead back onto the chain into place. Chains could always be mended, and beads could always be glued gently back together into near perfection once more.  
  
Maybe, just maybe, lives could be mended this way too...  
  
Scott was looking over a few records when someone gently knocked on his door.  
  
"Come in." he called, without looking up from his work. Slowly, Kurt slipped into the room, looking quite sheepish as he did so.  
  
"Scott?"  
  
"Kurt?" Scott looked up in surprise, and he smiled faintly as he got up. "How the hell have you been? Where have you been?" he asked. Kurt shrugged, waving his questions away with one hand.  
  
"Scott, I was wondering," he said softly. "Do you... Have my uniforms still?" When Scott nodded, he let out a soft sigh of relief. "I was wondering... I don't want to go back on missions though but... Can I..."  
  
"Go back to teaching?" Scott offered gently. When Kurt nodded, he smiled and clapped him on the back lightly. "Of course you can! We were all hoping that you would!" Kurt smiled faintly.  
  
"I'm glad about that." He said softly. "And about the missions?"  
  
"You don't have to start taking them until you're ready to." Scott assured him gently. "I understand what you're going through."  
  
But did he? Kurt didn't think he did, but he appreciated Scott's understanding about him not wanting to do nay missions for a while. Smiling, he took Scott's hand before he headed back to his old room.  
  
Emma had turned it into her make-up and accessory room, but with help from Warren, Logan, and Kitty; Kurt turned it back to his old room.  
  
Beside a wooden cross that hung over his bed, Kurt's rosary hung on a small nail. It had small chips in it, and the chain had small knots in it, but it was intact, and that was all anyone could ask for. 


End file.
